Building Life Skills That Matter for Your Homeschooled Teen with Traci Bakenhaster

Discover how Traci is equipping homeschool teens with essential life skills to confidently navigate adulthood through her innovative Adulting University Co-Op. From communication and critical thinking to career readiness, learn how her programs empower both parents and teens to bridge the gap and thrive in a modern world.

Become The Visible CEO https://thevisibleceo.com/becoming

Connect with Traci
https://adulting-university.com/auonline

Traci's Homeschool Moms Group  https://www.facebook.com/groups/auhomeschoolconnect

Don't forget to share this episode and tag me @itscrissyconner on Instagram and @crissyconner on Facebook to be entered to win!

Transcript

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Honestly, my motivation for starting this was because I know there's a huge gap in the upcoming generations when it comes to life skills and being really life ready. And I actually, I've worked in higher ed for years, and I did a lot with youth that were coming out of high school going into college. And I was like, Oh my gosh, these kids are so unprepared for life. And even though homeschoolers tend to be a lot more prepared a lot of the time, there's still, there's still a lot of gaps there, because as a parent, you can only do so much, right if you're in the data with trying to prepare and teach academics, and yeah, you're doing like skills, maybe at home, of like, teaching your kids how to do their laundry, those things, which is great. There's still this whole world of actual like regimen and life skills, like there's ways to actually communicate, there's ways to write resumes, there's ways to do these things the right way. And I feel like that is kind of missing a lot of time, and so I really wanted to help fill that gap and just come along families and support them in that space, so that they didn't feel alone, so they felt like they had a community. And they also felt that, oh my gosh, that relief of my kid is going to be okay when they leave home, which I think is like every parent wants that fear of like, are they going to make it? Are they going to hold their face? I don't know, yeah, just knowing that they are going to be equipped to handle life a lot better than even a lot of US adults were. Yeah, absolutely. And I think when it comes to the word adulting, it can mean different things to different people. So how do you find adulting in your world? And what are like some common misconceptions about adulting? Yes, I think the funny thing when I see adulting stuff, it's always like, the sarcasm, right? It's always like, Oh, you're adulting today, or hashtag adulting, I'm doing my laundry. And that's kind of why I wanted to play off of it, because it is that whole Association, that negative association, a lot of time with being an adult of like, all this stuff and like, oh my gosh, and co workers and employers and drama and relationships and like, all these things that, man, if I go back to being five, I didn't have to deal with any of this stuff, yeah, and I think it's just, again, that whole gap of, well, if we know how to handle those situations and those kinds of people and all those things, it makes adulting more fun. And adulting, I mean, just being an adult in general can be hard, right? It's a lot. There's a lot of stress. There's, you know, your financial stress and trying to make it on your own, and, you know, getting dumped or whatever. And so being able to really equip students and teens with those skills, where it doesn't have to be hashtag adulting in a negative way, can be, hey, I'm adulting today, like, Look at me. Go, right, so they're not still looking for the adult in the room like I sometimes am. Is what you're saying to actually be the adult in the room. Learner. I love it. I love it. Why do you think learning adulting skills today is, like, more important than ever? There's a lot of reasons. Number one, I think, especially when we're talking about youth, is social media. And it's funny, because as business owners, we utilize it, right? I know that's a big part of what you do. Is social media is so important, but for teens, it's become actually really detrimental. It's really between COVID and social media and just this online world we live in now, it is easy to go down rabbit holes, and it is easy for teens now to not develop skills that they would have done or would have been able to develop they didn't have those things. And so there's a big gap now, even bigger than there used to be, because, let's be honest, there's plenty of adults that were like, Man, I didn't learn that. I didn't learn how to properly manage money. I didn't learn how to manage conflict with a co worker, right? Then there's a big gap there. So then you have adults not being able to teach their kids these things because they've never learned that. Yeah, whole generation of kids that live on TikTok, and that's where they get their their their information and their skills and their knowledge, and they've kind of, I mean, I love our young generation, but a lot of them are very naive. And, you know, that's, it's a truth of like that naive is there. And you see, okay, these students are gonna be voting, or they're gonna be making decisions in their community or in their government. Are they educated? Do they know how to find the right information? Do they know how to actually learn things that they don't just see on TikTok or on reels or wherever? And so I think that that whole life skills piece just alone from that is so important, not even to mention all the research from employers that are like these generations, don't know how to handle the workplace, they don't know how to handle stress, they don't know how to communicate, right? There's so much research out there from employers that have had a really hard time with their upcoming generations in the workforce, because they're just different and not in a bad way. It's just there's a lot of skills that they kind of get gypped on learning because of a lot of the things they had to go through in their era. Yeah. So if you could teach one adulting skill to everyone, like, what do you feel like? The number one thing is that everyone needs that they're not getting. Oh my gosh, that is tough. You're asking me to narrow it down. Crissy, I know there's so many, but I feel like, okay, I would say it's kind of a tie, okay, but I would think critical thinking and communication, because without those solid skills, everything else doesn't matter. If you don't know how to think critically, you don't know how to find information, you don't know how to understand information. How are you going to make good decisions in any of your life? Yeah, including the finances and everything else. If you don't know how to communicate with people, you're not going to get very far in life, right? If you can't talk professionally to your boss, or you don't know how to communicate with your spouse or your kids or your parents or any of these things, it just really holds you back from your full potential. So I always believe that, like those are very, very foundational that everybody needs to have. And to be honest, a huge chunk of our society, not just teens, are missing those skills because they were never taught properly how to do them. Yeah, absolutely, absolutely. So over the past year, you've been pretty busy. You have created this, this adulting University Co Op. You have written a book, like a whole, real book, can we talk about these things and who these are for and how they can support them? Yes, absolutely, yes. The book, I feel like, the great starting place with that. So the book is for homeschool moms. In all reality, any mom that has a teenager is going to benefit from this book, like, if you have a pre teen or teenager like, this book is for you. We just targeted towards homeschoolers because that's who we primarily work with in our programs. But this book is basically when parents, I see parents all time, man, I wish there was a playbook on how to raise teens. I wish there was something that can help me learn how to teach my teens, blah, blah, blah. This is that book, like this book, literally is that here's what you need to do and how to do it to prepare a team for life after high school. So it's called adulting unplugged. It is very much just that real talk thing. Every chapter is dedicated to a very specific and essential and foundational life skill. Very first chapter is communication and critical thinking is in there as well. And it's not just a, oh, here's what you need to do. I also cover the how, which is, I think, so valuable, like, here's specific activities and things you can go do with your teenager to start to teach them this skill. Yeah, and people get download. Can download a workbook when they buy this book as well that goes along with it. That also gives additional activities, place for reflection, journaling, whatever for moms to kind of as they're going through this, like, oh, okay, this makes me feel a lot better. So it's that aspect of helping being that literally go to guide on how do I prepare my teenager for life? So yes, so that was been a very big project this year. It is finally in its almost ready to launch stage, which I'm very excited about. So it's been, yeah, and we are going to be doing a soft launch, and then we're doing a big launch on Amazon really soon. So and So, what age, like parents of, what age should would want to be in or would want to purchase this book? Yeah, I think the reality is, a lot of the skills in there, you can start at an early age, but I would recommend, like, if you have students that are at that almost pre teen age, like 1011, 12, you need this book because it's easier to start to teach them when they're younger, like that, versus trying to tell your 12th grader what they should be doing or how to help coach them in spaces when they're like, Hey, Mom. I know it all to me, and I will help you, because they'll listen to me. It's just reality of it. But I would say definitely give pre teens, young teenagers, 100% need this book. But again, even if you have a student that is at a 10th or 11th grade level that will be on the real world soon, it's still going to be valuable. There's still things you can do. And the way that I design it, it's not like, hey, go tell your team this. It's like, no, no, let's give you something you can do with your team, and unbeknownst to them, you're teaching them a really good skill, they don't realize they're learning. So you're not saying, Hey, we're gonna I'm gonna teach you about communication today like you're gonna do. It's not like that. So it's subtle, so that way the team doesn't feel like they're being lectured or taught at by mom. Well, I think it's interesting that you said around nine or 10, because think of all of the opportunities that are going to come across, you know, from that age till they graduate, right? That's a lot of opportunity for things. And once you understand the book, you're going to find, again, subtle ways to pull those in and teach and educate and ask questions. You know, I think that's one of the other things, is that, you know, asking questions, I think, is a huge thing, that sometimes we just assume that, you know, what's the new thing that everybody calls their mom, bruh, like, you know, and they're like, I don't want to talk to my kid, because that's all they say, um, but guess what, I'm still asking a question. You can call me whatever you want, but I'm still going to ask you questions, and we're still going to communicate. And you know, that's the one thing that I've taught my kids, sometimes in a threatening way, not going to lie, um, like, if you don't want to talk to me, then I'm going to turn your phone off. If you don't want to answer your turn your phone off. So if, and I have always said, If you communicate with me so much, this can go so much easier, right? And sometimes I feel like I'm still teaching my 25 year old that, but, um, but, you know, when you communicate like I don't, it doesn't seem like I'm nagging. Just tell me the truth, right? Even if you think I'm not gonna like it, just tell me the truth. Just tell me like it is. I'm doing the same for you. So, so, yeah, so I love the communication piece, but the other thing that I think we gotta talk about is this Co Op, because you've also put a lot of heart and soul into that this year, and I know that's going to be available for many homeschool families and different age groups. And so I'd love you to touch on that some too. Yes, absolutely. So our co op is so in the home school world, there are typically a lot of times those in person co ops, which is usually like a once go we kind of thing where people show up, but they usually have an academic and it's a good opportunity for students to connect and like see other students, especially in the homeschooling world. So I wanted to take that model, expand on it, and take it online, so that I could reach students anywhere, not just and so I built a virtual Co Op. And it is unlike the traditional co ops that are academic focused, ours is all life skills and career exploration, readiness focus. So it is truly like the life ready Co Op, if you will. So students that go through this program, especially if they start at our entry level, which is seventh grade, and they go all the way up through graduation, they are going to probably be some of the most well prepared people in the entire world, if we're being authentic with the way we've laid this program out. Every single year, they get a little bit more advanced skills, more advanced skills, more advanced skills. And we work them through all of this. They get daily text messages. I mean, they have weekly little mini lessons and challenges and implementations. They can win prizes. It's all gamified. I mean, it is truly like designed for teenagers. And the really cool part too is we still kept that Co Op feel where it's not just learning and education, it is still very much community focused. So we have clubs for students to join, with your great resume college application builders. We have weekly hangouts and socials together. We do trivia game nights like there are plenty of ways for students to connect and go through this program with students their age that could be from all over the place which there's so much benefit to that because they're being exposed to students from different states, different cultures, different backgrounds. And I think that's again, all of the design that went in was truly to prepare them for life, not just the actual skills we're teaching, but those indiscreetly taught things like, oh, communicating with students that may be different than you, you know, being able to engage in an online world, being able to talk to professionals that can come in and talk to you guys. So it's it is a very, very holistic and robust program that goes really well with whatever they're already doing in their homeschooling world. So whether they're already doing a co op once a week for academics, that's fine. You can still do this too. It's not it if or or it's an ant, and that's how I wanted it to be. I didn't want it to feel like you had to replace what you're already doing, but keep doing what you're doing. This is just another amazing program I love that are there any and I don't know if you know this or not, this just this question popped in my head, but are there any stats on teens and those going to become an adult, like, if they have more confidence in the skills that they learn through like programs like yours, like, does that benefit them? And it whether they go to college or whether they they go to a trade or something after high school? Like, does that benefit more than someone who doesn't have those skills? Yes. So there is actually quite a bit of research, not so much just in the homeschooling family realm, because that that one's a challenging Monday from because they're on their own, they're individual. But there is a ton of data with public school students, private school students, that are able to be able to be reached easier by surveying companies that show students that are prepared given life skills. It is insane the amount of change that can happen. And they're preparedness for life, their confidence, that's the big one that goes up. Don't rape students before and after, and students like I feel so much more like ready now for life than I did before. Yeah, and they just have that confidence. They're not hesitant. I feel like a big issue in the generations coming up right now is there's this really big fear and hesitation on going in the room, and that's across the board, whether they're home school students or not. It's this fear because they've seen, oh my gosh, look at all the inflation. Look that my parents can't afford stuff and nobody can afford things, and oh my gosh, and a hard life is they're seeing all this negativity from social media, from the news media, all these places, and they're like, I don't want that. Yeah, I don't want to go on to that. I'm just going to stay home because I don't know what else to do. Like, that is terrifying to me, and I even see, like, statistically, the amount is just being their driver's license now is down, and a lot of our wages are 18 or 21 are still not even getting it. And it's because I feel like that confidence of being able to be an adult, and that excitement for being adult not and I think a lot of it is because that lack of preparedness of like, well, I have no idea what I'm doing, like, the unknown right here, and hope I don't fall flat on my face, like, yeah. And I feel like that's what we're dealing with and seeing well. And I think too, like, for like, more along the public school line of things, parents are just assuming that teachers are doing it. I'm sure teachers are just assuming that parents are doing it. And at home school, you know, if you homeschool your kid, you know you are, it's you and you or you've prepared a program for them or something, or no one is doing it. Yeah, so you know, you know what they're learning. You're way more hands on. And sometimes, maybe these are the things that people are forgetting, because it's just the way it is. This is just what we do. And also, as adults, I think too, we just take these things for granted, because we know how we know how to do them right, where we figure it out, we know or we figure it out. And so that's why I think this resource is so great for anyone, but specifically homeschool families. I think it's going to be so great for them. At what age could they start this program? Yeah, so we started seventh grade. So basically, you're typically, most seventh graders around like, 12 years old. So that's when we start making up through seniors. I know the homeschooling world sometimes people hold their seniors back, or their seniors driveway a little early. It's okay we go base it off of the grade level. So you're saying, hey, they're a 12th grader. They're a 12th grader. Rather, they're 1817, or 20, and just being able to give them those those resources and tools, and then really roll this program out hopefully in the future, the plan is to have an alumni program for students that graduate from our program, to give them support for an extra year or two while they go to college or career or whatever they're looking to do. So yeah, and they could even be like, mentors, too. For the younger kids, I love that. I'm sure you already thought about that. That just popped in my head. I was like, oh, older students already get to be in a mentorship program. So let the 12th graders get a mentorship program with industry mentors. Yeah, careers in place they're interested in, which is so beneficial. But yes, eventually, as we roll out more graduating classes, I would love for them to come back and make mentors to our younger girls. I love it. I love it. Okay, let's weave in. Let's talk about this confidence. So we were talking about getting your teen and preparing them for life and creating this confidence, and how this goes into another conversation today, which is what we want to do, or I want to do, in the online space, and help more entrepreneurs be confident online showing up to grow their business. Let's chat about you and visibility. And how has visibility supported your growth in the online space? I feel like it has made the growth happen like I would not probably even have the connections or the leads that I would do have if it wasn't for being this one line and so, and I know you talk about the visibility space, and it's not just like you said, posting, it's getting out there other things like, I am very, very active in groups that are home supporters. I am always putting myself out there and reaching out to people and making those asks. I'm sending them messages. They request it. And I think that that all falls into visibility, of you have to be in front of people in multiple facets, and it's not easy, like, it's not easy, especially, you know life, life happens. And I mean, I know I 1000 different things, and I'm like, oh shoot, I didn't post on social media today. And this is like, oh shoot, I need to go do that really quickly, but it's just it is so valuable and it's so funny, because I can tell when I'm really getting good traction on like getting consistent visibility, because all of a sudden I'm starting to get more people respond to my emails, or people are actually asking me questions online or commenting on my stuff. And I can tell when I started to slow down, because it's all seven crickets everywhere. And it's so funny that you can see that. I mean, people like that immediate. What do you call it? Crissy, instant gratification? Yes, thank you. Instant gratification. And I feel like, in some way, visibility does kind of get you that might kind of get you the instant sale, but you're and it might not be instantaneous in that second, but it's pretty quick. Like, if you start to show up, it's all of a sudden, like, Huh, okay, people are coming out of the woodwork. It's like, oh, people are seeing stuff. And again, it's that repetition, that that consistency, which has not always been my strong suit on social media and being visible, but I've gotten a lot better at it, yeah, thanks to Crissy helping me out in that space. And a lot of it too, is shifting my mindset of and actually like enjoying it more, because initially, when I started business, it was just like that, oh, checklist how to do it. Hated social media with nothing to do with it. And now I actually enjoy it. I enjoy putting the post out there. Enjoy like interacting with people. I think it's so valuable, especially for an online business or business that serves people anywhere so and I think too, like we always talk about building like, know and trust you are working with people's children. So in your industry, this trust piece, like, if you never showed your face online, if you just put up graphics all the time and nobody who Traci was, it would be a huge disconnect in your industry, right? Because you, as a homeschool mom, probably wouldn't let your son work with anybody you'd never seen their face before, because it's like there's too many variables happening on the online face if I don't know who you are, yep, yep, that's exactly right. And I think that's one of the biggest challenges in any business, is knowing who your audience is. Like some businesses, sure, you don't have to show your face and you're going to get sales right, and it's whatever, but yeah, when you're talking about working with kids, especially in this capacity, because I'm not just selling curriculum, when I be selling PDFs and workbooks and guides and people buy that stuff, that's not a big deal. What I'm talking about half coaching your kid, they're going in this fully immersive program, yeah, and all these things, like, there's a whole different level there. And especially, I feel like in the home school world, because it is even more like, Hmm, who are you like, I don't know, than even like traditional parents would be. So it is a whole nother level. And so that has been a big challenge. And that's why that consistency piece is so important, though. Just kind of keep showing up, keep showing up, keep talking to people like it is, it is challenging. I'm still not where I want to be, but I'm getting there. Yes, that's the most important piece. We are always a work in progress. We're always refining, even I'm always refining. So I love that you said that. So anyone who so we have a program coming up next week called become the visible CEO. And so all of my clients, I consider our visible CEOs, because they are visible. They are all work in progress, Gaia, but they also are very visible, right? So if anyone was on the fence about joining this program, what would you say to them? I would say you have to, like, hands down, you need to do this because it is going to benefit you so much. Like if you want to get your business you want it to be you have to make those steps, and you have to put yourself out there, and you have to take those risks of saying, Okay, I'm going to commit to this. And it might be scary and it might be overwhelming, and I clue what I'm doing, but I might commit to this. And even if you just implement one little thing that Crissy teaches over the week, it's giving you traction. And I think that that's the main thing, is we can get some traction, and then we add something else and get some more, and then something else to get some more and just build off it from there. But honestly, especially if you're an online business, or you're trying to reach an online market, you've got to be visible. And I think in Crissy program, what awesome. I mean, I've been in our programs for years now. Our programs for years now, and I refuse, because Crissy is just an awesome supporter and cheerleader, and she also really knows her stuff when it comes to marketing. So I always tell people like, you got to do it. Just sign up. Yes, yes, I love it. And in case I didn't say this, it is a free program. When we do it live, it will be free. Yeah, it will be free. It will be paid in January, but it will be free with limited time access. So make sure you connect. There is a link in the comments. If there's not, I'll come around after the live and put it in there. Or always reach out to me. Or if you are a friend of Traci, feel free to reach out to her, and we can get that information to you. But to wrap today up, I want to refocus back on you. If someone wants to work with you, um, whether it's find out more about how you can support them or be a part of adulting. What is it called, again, adulting, university Co Op. Is that right? Did I say that? Right? Okay, okay, I didn't want to mess that up. So if they want more about that, how can they do that? Yeah, the best place to go to start is just going to our website and learning about it. So it is literally the fastest place to go. And I can also put that link in the comments too, but it is the best place to go to get, like, a snapshot of our co op. We have a full parent guide that you can download from there that gives you, like, a whole picture of what the program is. And of course, you can either fill out the application, if you're like, yep, this sounds amazing. Like, let's go and then we'll reach out to you, or you can schedule a public meeting, chat more. So best place to go to the website to kind of get started. And I want to say the Parent Guide. I got to see it. I get to see things from my clients before everybody else does. So I'm like, So lucky for that. This Parent Guide is the bomb. It is amazing. It is going to blow parents minds when they go through this and see what all is involved and what all is available for their child. So that is just that right there, and you they can grab that for free, right? They can just put their email address in and get that. But that is that is going to show you so much that's available, and so much of the the heart and soul that Traci has put into this program. Over the year, I've watched her build it. I've seen how much love she's put into this, and again, it's her passion. She's connected about it. She's done so much research, she has so much knowledge. She's spoken at so many events. And kids bring their parents to these events like it's not the parents dragging the kids. The kids are dragging the parents, if that tells you anything about her work with them. So if you have ever been on the fence, I can attest I'm her real life. We've hugged, we have pictures together. I've held her baby like we have a relationship. So if you're like, I don't know this person, I know this person, and she's in real life in Columbus, Ohio, but I know that she can help you no matter where you live when it comes to this program, so make sure you check it out. We'll get all the links, and if you don't see it fast enough, just DNA or Traci, and we'll make sure we get you that information. But I know that this, this tool, this this Co Op she's creating, going to be a game changer in the home school world, especially for those seventh grade and above like and if you're not there yet, get on get on her list. Get on her wait list, so that you know that that's available. And it's always top of mind when your child gets to that age and is ready for the next thing. So is there anything else that you want to share before we go? No, I think this. I think just like you said, like you said, like that, Parent Guide is really great because we've been service random. It really is a very robust program, and I don't want to sit here and just, you know, work on it all the details. Check out the Parent Guide. See if it's a good fit. We can always jump on a call. There's no pressure. It is strictly just to help and serve families. The other kids I mentioned, those mamas, this is just, there's an entire piece dedicated to the parent support too, including a parent, if they whole holistic Family Support Program. So I do like to mention too, because they want me to be like I me to like, we provide that to you as part of her. So it's no additional charge. It is like play. So when you have a teenager, you're like, Am I crazy? When? No, you're not crazy. So I survived so I get it. Wait, see you can serve and what's happening, dropping the my frozen your Xn, all Everything. Right. All right, dust. Welcome back to Our series of